I was in a BIG BOX Store the other day, hauling 4 kids (something I don’t recommend), trying to quickly get in and out, when the 6 year old decided he wanted to touch everything he passed.   Since he was successfully grabbing everything, his little brother thought it would be cool to PUSH everything he saw.  Things were flying off shelves faster than I could give them the “MOM LOOK.”  You know the LOOK that sends shock waves of fear, without having to say a word!

In an effort to ease tension and keep us from being thrown out, I delegated pushing the cart to my 10 year old with the baby inside, while I grabbed 2 little boy’s hands and gently guided them down the middle aisle, quietly threatening their lives if they touched one more item; when a woman walked up, (you know, the kind walking slowly toward you, but you’re not sure why).  She smiled and said:  THESE ARE THE BEST DAYS OF YOUR LIFE.

Now let me pause . . . because my first thought, was NOT Pretty!  An Attitude of CRAZY wanted to rise to the top.  As I slowly regained my eye sight, it was more like, Where’s the Roof, I May Jump.  If this is THE BEST . . . I mean,  The BEST, then we’ve got a problem.

I was hoping more for:  “Hang in there, it gets better.”  If someone dangles a carrot of hope, I can keep going, but telling me this is IT:  We have arrived at the station! These are the BEST Days, left me exiting the store, like a deflated balloon.  I could have walked across the street, never seeing oncoming traffic, thinking this IS IT?  I’ve heard horror stories of rebellious teenagers; heck, I was one myself.  But hearing,  These were the Best Days, left me in a state of despair.

As I lay in bed, in the dark hours of the night, pondering what she meant, I began to access my life, our situation, the crazy, loud life of raising a gaggle of kids so close in age.  I couldn’t help but laugh.  I couldn’t help but review my circus-filled life of my 2 year old flapping her little chicken arm, trying to do an “arm fart” at the kitchen table, something she had seen her 3 brothers do.  I laughed at the thought of my 4 year old playing the violin, still wearing his bike helmet or my 6 yr old writing the words:  Left and Right on the top of his new tennis shoes with a SHARPIE Marker, so he wouldn’t forget.

If we redefine what is GOOD in our lives – these are good times, if we see it for what it is, and not the unrealistic expectations of what it could be.  If we understand that our house is probably going to look like 12 people live in it, then our mindset will change.

Instead of taking things too seriously and always seeing the bad, the negative aspects, we need to lighten up and think, what would we do if the kids weren’t here?  Ok, Italy comes to mind, but for the long haul, this journey we’re on:  leading, guiding, loving; this adventure we’re on, eventually leads to them leaving the nest.  Embrace the good, the bad and the loud; so the next time you are walking the aisles, gaining attention of judgmental eyes – smile and whisper to yourself:  These are the Best Days of My Life, because they are MINE!

Here’s to Living the Best Version of You.

I visited a doctor’s office the other day and for insurance purposes the questionnaire asked what I did for a living. Never understanding why it matters, I wrote:  MOM.  I used to say Director of Communications or Business Owner and boy did that feel good.  It said everything I needed to say in 2 -3 words to boost my ego.

Now, when I fill in the box with :  MOM – I hear 2 little words in my head:   “JUST A.”  I felt compelled to explain, as if I needed a paragraph to say: I cook for a small army, ya know, planning menus, organizing schedules, responsible for annual budgets.  We’re teachers, accountants, counselors, chauffeurs; we’re public relations, risk management, the CEO of our Household all rolled into one.

For whatever reason, I’ve become my own enemy in viewing the word MOM, as if I had been retired from active duty, been put to pasture, as if staying at home meant doing nothing.  With a title like Director of Something, there’s a value set to it; a monetary figure, a set of skills earned to attain this position.  With the title of MOM there’s no financial figure tied into the equation, therefore motherhood doesn’t reflect the respect it deserves.  After all, who would work for nothing?

While I know that’s not true, I somehow felt compelled to march in a parade, hold my flag high as if to say:  we guide little hearts into adulthood, teaching them to be productive citizens, raising leaders of tomorrow.  Perhaps it’s because our pay rate doesn’t translate in monetary form.  No real salary, pay increase, bonus or vacation days.  While greenbacks are a definite bonus, the benefits of parenting far out way financial perks.

I then realized, why do I care what the world thinks.  I’m not in charge of changing global perception, rather my own.  The problem is with me.  In the end, I know my credentials, my capabilities. There’s no need to post a sign on my car advertising my resume.  What matters is that I’m focusing my attention, my abilities and talents on guiding my children (doing my part) to raise the best individuals they can be, one person at a time.  One day they will be someone’s employee, boss, spouse, parent, friend;  that’s my contribution, my legacy.

So here’s a shout out to all those moms (working at home/ in the office) who will NOT make the Forbes’ Top 100 list.  Your reward is mentoring those trailing a little behind you in life’s journey.  There are no term limits, no set guidelines.   No matter what you write in the BOX OF LIFE, that one-word description can’t possibly DEFINE all the many facets of Who You ARE and what you do. Here’s to Living in Confidence, knowing you are where you need to be, this moment in time.

Someone asked me the other day, what was my most memorable Holiday. I think they were anticipating a story filled with fun traditions and great family memories.

Instead, I said:  We lost our 4 yr old son at Mall of America.  You know, the largest Mall between here and Canada.   Nestled in Minneapolis, MN, this 5.2 million square foot facility contains roller coasters, a water park, a  theme park – and that’s just the first floor!

We lost (Oh I’m sorry – I mean, my HUSAND) lost our son while watching the 4 of them in Lego Land.  I traveled 3 stories from the food court with 6 bags of chicken nuggets and upon my return, noticed one was missing.

We searched high and low for that child.  No doubt, my husband’s hands were full.  Four kids ages 8 to1 in Lego Land can’t be easy.  But the more we searched and couldn’t find the little fella, the more my anxiety grew exponentially.

After calling Mall Security, we noticed a commotion, almost like a parade of people marching from the 3rd floor, making their way down the escalators.  Police officers, lightening equipment, cameras:  It looked like channel 2 news had arrived on the scene.  As I’m telling my husband, through tears, what I’m gonna do to him if we don’t find our child, we are circled by a camera crew – recording tears, private conversations and police interviews.

It turns out, Mall of America was taping Mall Cops for a television series on TLC.  Seriously?  Only to us would this happen – The Crazy Family; though we look fairly normal on the outside.

They asked if we’d be interested in signing a contract to be on TLC’s 1st Thanksgiving episode.  Now isn’t that Special.  Their first episode.  (Do you hear the cynicism)?

She said: It’s a story about families coming together.  Oh REALLY! ?  Uh, I wasn’t born yesterday, but I’m thinking it’s a story about Horrible Parents who can’t keep up with their kids in a mall the size of Montana.  After finding him in Spongebob Land, we made a bee-line to the car with TLC’s paparazzi camera crew chasing us with a contract, begging us to share our “Wonderful Family Reunion Story.”  We were all out of breath, running with strollers and diaper bags. I’ve never buckled kids in a car so fast. I’m pretty sure we left skid marks in the parking lot.

So when you’re beating yourself up for thinking you’re a terrible mom, because you forgot to feed little Johnny something with color for dinner or you missed Timmy’s Parent-Reader Day, forgot to slip money under the pillow from the tooth fairy or didn’t sign up your son for the football team, just think, you could be sharing your story on TLC with the whole world.  We all have tough days when life’s margins are running thin.  Just remember, we’re not perfect, but a work in progress.  Do your best and forget the rest.  Here’s to making holiday memories – ONLY the GOOD ONES!

Asking a mom if she ever feels guilty is like asking a woman if she likes chocolate.  It’s a “no brainer.”  It comes with the territory.  Show me a mom and guilt is around the corner.

Like the song:  Should I Stay or Should I Go, guilt peeks its ugly head like a fire breathing dragon.  Should I quit work and stay at home.  Should I go back to work?  Do I volunteer enough, did little Johnnie get plenty of hugs last week?  Are my kids eating healthy enough, are they in the correct activities?  If only I were a better cook, skinnier, happier – and as the plates continue to spin, so does our head.

Guilt is tricky in that whatever you do, the void can’t be filled.  Whatever choice you make, it’s the wrong one.  If you’re here, you should be there, ying should be yang, up should be down, right is wrong, the grass is always greener, and the cycle continues.

There’s a book recently published called:  “Enemies of the Heart”.  It discusses the characteristics of Guilt and spurs one to answer the questions:  Who do you owe and What do you owe?

Often, the “Guilty” hat follows us around like a permanent cloud, a dark shadow you can’t outrun.  The author, Andy Stanley suggests if we can answer Who do we owe and What do we owe, we’ll break free from this emotional control.  Guilt, a destructive power, tries to set us up for failure, before we’re out of the gate.  Look guilt in the face, make it play a fair game.

Whatever circumstances you’re in, perhaps something unforeseen, a bad marriage, a bum deal at work,  miscommunication, a child in a difficult phase, whatever the case, set up a plan of action.  If you’re happy at work, embrace it.  If you’re happiest at home and can afford to stay, seize it.  We’re not living in Utopia where everything is perfect.  We’re living in a world full of too many choices, too little time and one mom trying to juggle it all.

Don’t let Guilt rob you of the joy you have, in whatever position or spot you land.

Guilt is a “Happiness” robber, a contentment thief.  It’s no respecter of persons and doesn’t care what side of the fence, saddle or route you’ve chosen. Guilt will find fault with whatever stance you take, making you feel as though you’ll never meet the standard, complete the race or be truly successful.  It’s a 2nd guesser, a what-IF-ER.

It’s not your friend, rather an enemy that needs to be set sail.  If you had a “friend” who treated you this way, they would be sent on their way in a heart beat, with a footprint on their back side, yet we cuddle up with GUILT like a warm blanket and hot chocolate, hosting it in the most sacred position: our home, our heart, our life.

Identify Guilt for what it is, recognize it and whack it with a broom.  Tell it out loud:  NO MORE!  Answer the questions:  Who do I owe and what do I owe and in this, you’ll find the peace, the contentment you need to embrace the Happy in the place you’re in.

Do Your Best and Forget the Rest.  Here’s to living a life with contentment and purpose.

Have you ever been eating a fantastic dessert, holding an interesting conversation, looked down and thought, “Who Ate My Pie?”

As I’ve raised kids, started and sold a business, worked from home and dealt with life’s struggles and juggles, I looked up and wondered:  Where did my Sexy Go?

I started looking for it.  Did someone steal it from under my nose?  Did I loose it on the way to having kids?  Did it get tired of seeing me wear PJ’s till noon during the baby years?  Had I not made room for it amongst soccer, ballet, deadlines and dishes?  Was there not an extra seat in my minivan?

As I began to search for my distant friend, I had to remember what it looked like.  Had it matured?  Could we still be friends?  Would we fit together with the ease we once knew?  Would we recognize one another?

Defining Sexy is an ambiguous term.  Sexy is more than a little black dress, heels, red lipstick and a come-hither attitude.

Sexy is:

1) Confident

2) Strong / Independent

3) Chilvalious

4) It’s Quiet, it’s Loud

5) It’s Smart

6) It’s Empowered

7) It’s Vulnerable

It’s Courageous

9) It’s Capable

10) It’s Authentic

Sexy is an attitude, a mindset without a specific physical look.  Sexy is not whiny, needy, in constant longing of affirmation; it’s not weak.  It’s not crying over why your life didn’t turn out the way you expected.

Sexy pulls you up by the boot straps and turns your life around, makes changes you’ve always needed but hadn’t.  It’s the girl that realizes she’s the BOSS of Her OWN LIfe, the Leading Lady in her Own Movie, the Conductor of Her Own Train, the Decider of Her Own Fate.

With every decision you make and every word that comes from your mouth, choose to be confident and empowered. Sexy either lives here or it doesn’t and a little black dress is just one of its many outfits.  Here’s to Celebrating the Empowered You – Now that’s Sexy!

I love to be happy, who doesn’t, right?  Webster’s defines Happiness as as state of Well-being and Contentment.  Well, sign me up.

I went to the “World of Coke” and their new slogan is “Open Happiness.”  Wouldn’t it be wonderful that every time your kid has a bad attitude, someone colors the living room wall or you slam your finger in the door, just grab a coke and “Open Happiness.”

Y, I’d have an 18 wheeler backed up to the front of my house, unloading 12 ounce cans of Happiness, quicker than he could blink.  Load me up, boys.

But it’s not that simple.  Happiness is not “The Midas Touch” where everything you put your hand to, turns to gold.  Happiness is a state of well being, wherever you are, in the moment – find contentment.

You don’t need to climb another rung on the corporate ladder, longing for a sportier car, a larger house, a shiner ring. It’s true contentment, just the joy of Being where you are, in the moment.

Try lying in in your backyard, looking up at the stars one evening.  Practice contentment.  It’s not usually a friend that’s beating down the door to get in,  but more of a quiet satisfaction.

Wherever you are, in whatever stage of life, take a deep breath, make a list of what makes you thankful; and Open Happiness, it’s zero calories.

After 4 kids, and the fact that they EAT 24/7, eating in-between eating, it’s crazy. There are PB&J sandwiches, chicken nuggets and goldfish crackers everywhere, while the Strawberries sit nicely on the counter, waiting patiently for someone to try them.  Now that my youngest is 2, I can’t use; “I just had a baby” as an excuse for weight I had gained.

I joined an online-points tracking system.  You enter what you ate into the “food tracker” and what activities you did, in the “activity tracker.”  If I walked 3 miles, I’d type “walk” in the tool bar, to see how many points I’d earned toward my goal; and this is what the drop box said:  I kid you not:

Which did you do today?

Walk up stairs carrying 1-24 lbs (I assume kids or laundry)

Walk carrying a snow or leaf blower

Walk/Run with crutches

Walk pushing a wheel chair (didn’t mention a stroller)

Walk with a horse

Walk with golf clubs (ok, I’ll give ya that one)

I have to admit, I was hard pressed just to find:  Walking.  You know, fast paced, cardio, exercise-worthy Walking!  I’ve walked a million miles up stairs carrying laundry and children. By their standards, I should be skinny by now. It seemed as though they were giving us more excuses, for not really getting out and sweating.

Between kids and activities, school, taxi service, homework, office projects, dinner and bath time, some days it feels like there’s nothing left.  But you were a whole person with great ideas and thoughts before marriage and kids – now It’s time for You.  It’s time to write down those goals and begin accomplishing for Mwau!

I’ve spent too many years wishing this and hoping for that, without taking steps toward the goal.  I’d love to click my heels,  have a Genie in a Bottle at My Command and, Poof, the house is clean, Boom – To Do List – gone!  I could wish that I love to run, or put on gym clothes and hope to make it outside today; I think of things all day long.  But without Action, it doesn’t change a thing; except the guilt that tends to build inside.

Have you ever laid in bed, knowing you’re late to something, but didn’t want to get up? Yet, you lay there, procrastinating, not even enjoying time in bed, for worrying and thinking about how late you’re gonna be.  It’s time to Get Up, Grab Life by the Horns; Be Ahead of the Game for once.  It Feels Good.

No more whining, complaining, waiting, thinking, pondering, lying around perpetuating GUILT and knocking yourself over all the Energy You Place into Doing Nothing.  Become the Productive Citizen you always Hope for your own Children; get off your Rear and Take Action Today . . . Now . . . For You!  Be the Example.

Wanna own a business, write a blog, a book, join a team, invent a product, start a club . . . be the NFL’s oldest cheerleader?

No more “walking with crutches or pushing a wheel chair.”  This behavior offers very few rewards.   It’s time to Get Up, Lace up those Running Shoes, Open the Door Of Life and Take On what you’ve been mulling over for years.  You know what it is.  Write it Down and Trump It.

“You’re off to Great Places! Today is your day!

Your mountain is waiting, So… get on your way!”  Dr. Seuss

The Fabulous – Facebook – Fasade

Have you ever taken a photo of yourself and saw all the flaws and thought . . .  I wish I could photoshop that?  But it’s real life, right?  The Fabulous Life of Facebook works the same way.  We take our ordinary life, flaws and all, and write a fabulous post – minus the mundane – and thus, tweak our “picture of life.”

Who wants to hear that you can’t think of another way to make “Chicken” for dinner?  Who wants to hear that you have 9 more loads of laundry and you haven’t washed your hair since Wednesday? or that you ran out of gas on the way to soccer, and you feel like a dummy.

My life is pretty average.  I have 4 kids, and like most, I spend my days doing laundry, cooking dinner, making school lunches, running kids to and from soccer practice, art, music lessons, help with school projects, throw in a daily workout, write articles and try to scratch off the “To Do List” faster than items HOP on it.

In between all the laughter, the tears, the 2 year old hollering “EAT” EAT” EAT” & the 3 boys running in the house with new “tree house” ideas & school projects, something out of the ordinary will happen, that I need to post to Facebook; something fabulous, something worthy of celebration, that’s outside the realm of my laundry-piling, meal-cooking, diaper-changing day.

It reminds me of planning our Annual Family Photo;  it takes a couple of weeks to figure out what everyone is wearing; we have to match colors on some level,  organize outfits, have backups in case there are food spills and . . . you know the drill.

We typically do outdoor shots, and though the picture turns out fabulous, because our photographer, Crissy, is so talented, what I remember most are the gnats swarming around our heads, the dog spotting a duck across the pond and racing like a grey hound to catch it, the kids begging to play at the park and the baby crying because we had placed her in a red wagon, where she thought we were leaving her forever.

I remember after arranging all the clothes, loading everything in the car and arriving at our location, we had forgotten the babies’ pants.  Oh Dear God.  A turtle neck and a diaper, NICE!  And yet, the picture you see, is the Great American family, well put together – Living the Dream.  That’s right . . . Livin’ the Dream!

We get our kids all dressed to see Santa Claus.  They’re in red and plaid; the older kids are posing because you want them to – and the baby is screaming like mad, while the Santa Helper is clanging a bell to get their attention.  It’s all about the “Money Shot.”  Getting the kids to smile at the camera, all the while your upper lip is sweating.  It’s craziness.  This isn’t real life.  But we need to get the “Facebook” moment.

I have a friend that sends Christmas pictures of what REALLY happens when their family photo is taken.  It’s hilarious.   There’s always someone crying, one kid is goofing off and it’s AWESOME.  To be honest, it makes for a better story.  It makes me laugh so hard and the memory of that day is more precious.

So instead of “photo shopping” your life for the “Facebook” Moment, post the good, the bad and the mundane.  Just as “Chicken Soup” is Good for the Soul, posting “Real Life” is Good for the Spirit.    We’re all in This Together.  Here’s to truly living your life, inside out!

Live Your Best Life

I’ll be 40 this year.  I know, I can’t believe it myself.  I use to say:  Yes, Ma’am to those people.  My heart tells me I’m younger, but the lines on my face and the amount of energy, tell me otherwise.  I’ve been mulling it over for about a year, what to do for my 40th birthday.  Something radical? Out of this world? Never been done? I need to scrape together a bucket list, and FAST! I’m gonna be 40 people!

I could jump from a plane, learn a new language.  Maybe climb the Himilayas . . . Heck, I’m not even sure how to spell Himilayas.

Then I realized if 39 is anything like 40, it should feel like 38 or 37 for that matter.  It’s just a number and I didn’t need a number designating what “Crazy Act” to perform, at least not in the next 30 days.  Whether I learn to Salsa Dance or ride a Gondola in Venice, I have lived a great life, full of stories, adventures and friendships.

I don’t need a red convertible or seats to the U.S. Open, to tell me I’ve lived life.  Everything I have, (my kids, my family, my hobbies, my friends, my journey in this life) is right where I want it to be.

I don’t need to fly with Virgin Air on their first outer space mission, to know I’ve lived life to its fullest.  As I struggled with this concept, (Have I truly embraced all life has to offer?  Am I missing out on the excitement that’s out there?) I took a stroll one evening.

As I entered the house from the back porch, I looked through the window and saw my kids running around in the living room, jumping on my husband like a jungle gym; they were so happy, giggling about nothing and everything at the same time; the baby was dragging her blanket in one hand, while holding a baby doll in the other; the dog was barking, trying to get-in on the action; and that’s when I realized, my Bucket List was being checked off the entire time.

While it’s important to integrate some of those crazy “bucket list” adventures into your life, you don’t have to crunch them into a couple of months to prove your youth or vitality.

40 is the new 30.  But even if wasn’t, I have happiness, joy and love all around me, and if that’s not a goal to achieve, then what else is there?  Embrace today’s moments, and be thankful for all the Goodness in your Life.  Here’s to 40 and Beyond!

Have you ever been driving to your kid’s school or your parent’s house, and without thinking, you just ended up at your destination?  You don’t really remember the journey, because you drove in a daze and appeared there?  That’s when you know it’s time to shake it up a bit.

We get in Life’s “Rut” taking the kids to sports and ballet, running to the same grocery store, the same office, making the same 5 meals and wondering:  How did we get here?  It’s time to “Jump the Curb” girls. Get out of Life’s “Rut” and challenge ourselves to think outside the box.

My husband has traveled to NY on business, for years – and I never go, because . . . who’s gonna keep 4 kids for 4 days?  Besides, you’d spend hours pulling together medical information, school projects, little Henry has to be at baseball on Thursday, you know the gist.  It’s more work to pack and make lists, find baby sitters, write down “what-if” scenarios that will probably never happen and the list goes on.

But I did it.  I bit the bullet and wrote it all down, made all the arrangements and flew to NY for a weekend of adventure with my hubby.  And the return on the investment was priceless.  It was worth all the work.  As I walked through Times Square, I felt liberated.  I found the “Fun Girl” again, that lives life “off the cuff”, not worrying about changing diapers or making dinner.

My husband found his “girlfriend” again.  We dated that weekend and it was fun to hold hands and just go back in time to the way it use to be, without a million responsibilities.

On Friday, my husband went into the office, which gave me a day to myself to wonder the streets.  I got up early, went to NBC Studios, picked up standby tickets and hoped for the best. To be honest, I was nervous to leave the hotel, navigating all the streets, looking for buildings and entrances, all by myself.  But if I had not done it, I would have missed a day of adventure.

Instead of watching Dr. Oz on TV, I got to see him in person.  And that made for a fun story.  “Jumping the Rut of Life” is free-ing and fulfilling and will go along way, in taking care of your kids.  It’s makes you a better provider, heck, a better person for that matter.

It’s fun to let it all go and find your “core self” again.  Repeat this:  I’m Free to Be ME!!!!!!!

So when you’re up to your neck in mommy duties and you need a break, big or small “Jump Out of the Rut.”  Find yourself!  In doing so, you’ll gain liberation on your journey to adventure.

Empowering moms for success – while making lunches kid’s will eat.

Click Link Below for Lunch & Snack Ideas:

Kid’s Lunch Ideas

I’ve received a lot of tips, tricks and ideas over the years, regarding school lunches and thought I’d share them with you.  Too often, I was the ill-prepared mom who couldn’t find 2 pieces of bread the morning of, to make a simple sandwich.

Providing a variety of healthy meals your kids will actually eat – is not easy.  At the beginning of the week, the kids and I collaborate on menu ideas:  criteria is based on healthy, tasty, do-able lunches.

I typically marinade and grill all my chicken on Sunday afternoon, and place them in sealed containers.  I’ll go ahead and cut part of the chicken into stripes or nuggets, for the kids lunches and set them aside in different zip locks, for the week.

I wash all the fruit and divide them into zip lock bags also.  I do the same with cookies / crackers – making the vanilla wafers with peanut butter, cutting the cheese, and dividing them into enough zip locks to handle 4 kids for the week.

I also make lunches for the little ones who stay at home.  This way, when they’re hungry, they just go pick up their lunch box out of the fridge and no one misses a beat.  If we’re running errands, I just grab their lunches and they can eat on the way.

After school, my older kids read the menu and grab the pre-made lunches already divided up – and place them in their lunch box.

It’s not easy being a mom.  Let’s stick together girls.  I’d love to hear your ideas.

Here’s to empowering moms for success – and lunches kid’s will eat.  : )

People call or send emails weekly, asking questions about raising kids and I have to say, having 4 does NOT make me an expert, rather a person who’s probably failed many more times than not, doing the wrong thing, more than the average person.  So hey, if you can learn from my mistakes, that’s even better.

I’ve had more opportunities to fail.  Don’t you feel better ALREADY?  And probably apologized way more times than you’ll ever have to, and am always reminding myself that Practice makes Progress.  It’s called Life – and we’re on this crazy journey together.

1) What’s it like to have 4 kids?

The same as having 2 or 3, it’s just exponential with each child.  I have friends who have many more than me, and some with learning disabilities, so I, by no means, have it as hard or feel as frustrated as some moms who really have to kick it in gear when they don’t always feel like it.  To you, I salute your determination.

For us, it’s Crazy and Loud and everyone’s always hungry . . . there’s a ton of laundry.  But I don’t think about it too often.  Mostly because there’s no time.  I spend my days repeating myself and very seldom do I finish a complete sentence, thought or phrase without interruption.  Whether you have 2, 4, 6 or 8, you still have to make dinner, crank up the washer and drive kids around, so – GREAT JOB MOMS!  You deserve to make your own treasure box full of goodies. (www.dancepartyforone.blogspot.com)

2) Friends ask:  Was it hard having 4 kids?

No.  The answer is an Epidural.  That seemed like the easy part, until my epidural didn’t work once, for about 30 minutes, and I heard something in the room that sounded like a wolf howling.  I know, it scared me too.  But when the epidural works, it’s like the Disney Slogan:  It’s a Magical Day!

3) What sort of responsibilities do you give your kids?

Around our house, if 6 people make one mess, it’s gridlock, so everyone is responsible for cleaning up and putting back what they take out.  The kids (no matter the age) help in some capacity with the dishes, the laundry, cleaning their room and feeding the dog.  OK, Max gets jibbed some days, but for the most part, he’s fed daily.  We’re a team – and that means everyone has a role to play for the success of our family.  It’s all for One and One for All.

4) How do you instill a sense of community in your children’s lives?

We can easily become selfish and live in a world that is “ALL ABOUT ME”  It’s important that the kids see it as “WE” not Me.  We’re a community and have to help one another.  I show them pictures of the kids we sponsor in Africa and have them give a percentage of the money they earn through household responsibilities, to purchase items to give as gifts through Samaritan’s Purse.  They get so excited to use their own money to purchase fun items for other children.

5) How do you discipline your kids?

Every child is different. But this is what typically works for us: If the kids get into big fights and the one at fault is unwilling to apologize, I will randomly allow the offended party to decide the punishment.  i.e. the offender goes to bed 15 minutes earlier than everyone else.  That usually does the trick.  Next time, they’ll treat others as they would like to be treated.

If they breach a virtue (i.e. lie, cheat, steal) or disrespect mom, (rolling of the eyes/ slamming the door) it’s immediate corporal punishment.  They already know the rules, so they should consider that, their fair warning.

Carelessness, not listening . . . like throwing balls in the house and breaking things, equates to more chores beyond their regular day to day responsibilities, or taking away games, television, DS.  When we take away one of the big 3, they tend to “turn their ears on” quicker.

6) How do you stop your kids from waking up at 5:30am on the weekends?

There are no cartoons before 8:30am and each child has an electronic clock in his/her room.  They have to sleep or play in their room until they see 8 3 0.  Otherwise, the first task of the day is a chore, such as folding towels or cleaning the playroom.  This usually does the trick and we all get to sleep-in on the weekends.

7)  How do you do everything?

Who says I do.  Between sports, homework, chores, music lessons and life in general, we’ve eaten cereal for dinner on occasion. 85% of the time, the kids take healthy lunches to school.  The other 15%, they eat in the cafeteria.   There comes a time when “the list” becomes too long, the plates need extra spinning and you have to let go of something.  Give yourself permission to Surrender.

There’s no guideline that says we have to raise our kids a certain way.  Make it fun, adventurous, outside the box.  Eat dinner at the park, have the kids make their own lunch for a change.  No one is going to die.  You just need a break to recoup, re-strategize and re-define your goals.  As I’ve heard it said before:  Do your Best and Forget All the Rest.

Do you feel guilty doing fun things for yourself?

Absolutely Not!  You should feel guilty if you DON’T.  As the CEO of my Household, it’s important to take care of me; be a good example of a well-rounded, happy person, engaged in outside events, hobbies, social activities, tennis, date night, spa day, healthy activities that inspire you to be a better mom, wife, sister, daughter and friend.

You want the kids to see that life can be fun after childhood, and if it’s not:  you might need to re-access.  It’s not just about paying bills, cleaning the house and running kids from here to there.  Don’t be a martyr. Life is what you make it: Now get out there and make it FULL, FUN & FABULOUS!

When I was 11 years old, we had a school fundraiser – selling cookies, and the top 10 winners got a chance to walk on stage in front of the entire school and choose from over 100 items.  It was the ultimate treasure box of electronics, sports equipment and apparel. I felt like I had died and gone to heaven.  I began selling cookies door to door and within 2 hours had sold over $400.

My mom was so shocked and amazed at my drive to win a prize, she joined the mission and drove me all over town, ending with $1000 worth of cookies sold by sunset.  I came in 3rd place and proudly walked on stage, glancing at everything carefully, picking up this and checking out that, until my eyes landed on . . . drum roll please . . . a Red Panasonic Cassette Player & Recorder.  I proudly walked off that stage beaming, as if someone had given me a sports car.

Like most kids, mine will do anything for a Gold Star, Money or Prizes from the Treasure Box.  Sometimes I wish someone would give me a treasure box.  I’d surely be more motivated. Why should kids have all the fun?  So when my friend Becky challenged me to write down 10 things under $10 that I could reward myself with, instead of food, I went right to work.

I’m a gift person, so I figured I’d have my list completed within a couple of minutes, but what I realized is:  I knew everyone else’s list, but had trouble figuring out my own.  It’s in our nature to serve others, often times forgetting about ourselves.  It’s much easier to give, than receive.

We’re not used to having the tables turned – instead we’re taking dinner orders, like an overworked waitress handling 6 tables at once, with life’s demands flying on our “to do” list quicker than we can strike them off.

I’m much like the kids – a rabbit chasing a carrot.  You dangle a play pretty in front of me, I’m immediately motivated to do what it takes to get the job done. . . laundry . . . dishes. . . groceries.  If you splash a little motivation in the mix, it’s amazing how much work you can squeeze out of me.

What motivates you?  Create a list of 10 items under $10 and reward yourself!  Here’s my list, to get the creative juices flowing.  Make yourself a treasure box.  You deserve it!

Stephanie’s Treasure Box:

Sleeve of Golf Balls (pink or bright yellow) – easier to find in the woods

Movies: Comedies: Sweet Home Alabama / Christmas Vacation

Inspirational Books / Biography’s / Magazines

Eye brows waxed – this is good for everyone

Fun Jewelry – Rings (Pier One Imports, Target, Art/Glass Shops)

iTunes downloads

Tennis Balls (I love to hear the sound of freshness when I pop open a can)

Colorful knit scarfs

Girlie Baseball Caps

Fun Nail Polish

So here’s to creating your very on treasure box.  Thanks Becky for your inspiration and your blog:  dancepartyforone.blogspot.com

I was 5 years old playing dress up, when I got the bright idea to put on a pair of tennis shoes with a pair of women’s panty hose over the top of them.  While I wasn’t the brightest one of the bunch, I had my moments, but that wasn’t one of ‘em.

When I went to pull off my tennis shoes, they wouldn’t budge.  With the panty hose over the top, no matter how much I kicked, screamed, rolled and slung, those shoes would NOT come off. The more I wrestled, the more frustrated I got, and in the end, I was laid out on the floor, exhausted with stretched out panty hose and 2 shoes draggin’  behind.

That’s how it is with life sometimes.  We try to re-arrange the process, skip a few steps and wonder why life doesn’t work out the way we planned.  Without any prayer, counsel and the attitude that “I’m gonna do this myself, come hell or high water,” we’re wearing our panty hose on top of our shoes.

We skip through life trying to make things work on our own, shoving squares into round holes, wondering why some days, the world is against us.

When the entire time, God is wanting us to Be Still and Know that He is God. Ps. 46:10

Instead of praying about our day, our friends, our choices, our daily decisions that will effect our family and their lives, we just go and do what we want, with little thought or effort about God’s plan for our day, our week, our life.

In everything you do, put God first, and he will direct you and crown your efforts with success. Proverbs 3:6.

That means, pray before starting the day.  Pray for good friends, wise choices; perhaps that God will place someone in your path who needs YOU, today. Pray for your kids, that they’ll have favor with their teachers, their friends, their employers.

Placing God first, is always a good way to start the day.  No more spinning your wheels with little productivity.  In the end, we’re not really playing dress up.  This is real life and there’s no time for Panty Hose Drama.

Try New Things and Shake It Up

Over the years, there have been several organizations, ideas, blogs, products and services that have changed my life for the better.  Here’s what has worked for me and I’d like to pass it along to you.

I have a “Great Ideas” file and whenever I hear a great idea, slogan, quote, brand of perfume, website, blog, business strategy, song, commercial, something funny the kid’s said, brand of shoes, mom tip, newspaper article or book idea, I write it down for a day I may need it.  It may not work for me now, but it may later.

iPod with Favorite Music:

Find that special place, whether the park, the local running track or just in your neighborhood.  When you feel good and listen to upbeat music, you’ll walk faster, get your heart rate up, work out issues that weigh heavily on your mind.  You may forget you’re working out.

Helping Others:

http://www.410bridge.org

Partner with an organization, where you connect with non-profits that utilize your gifts to serve others.  Bring fresh water to African nations by giving your money, your time to build wells for clean water:  Help identify and implement solutions to physical and spiritual needs in their community. It’s nice to drink clean water.

Athletics:

Pull out the old Tennis Racquet and build a healthier you:  It doesn’t matter whether you are good or if you even know the rules – who cares.  You’re moving.  You can’t take care of others, if you’re in a mess yourself.  There’s a free public tennis court on every corner.  Put on cute gym clothes.  Statics show, if you look good, you feel good and it makes you want to take care of yourself . . . or maybe you’ll feel guilty if you don’t work out.  : )

Blog:

http://www.dancepartyforone.blogspot.com/

This is a blog about finding YOU again, after having kids, weight gain, being pulled in every direction, till you can’t find YOU anymore.  It offers encouraging articles and videos about finding that “Sexy You” again and creating a dream list of things you’d like to accomplish for yourself.

http://www.franklinmom.com

Nashville mom that shares great recipes, grocery lists, ideas for kids, after school activities, etc).

Books – A Good Read:

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey

Boundaries by Henry Cloud

In reading these books, I discovered that “NO” is a complete sentence.  You have to take control of your life, or others will do it for you.  An organized house can bring peace to the soul and paying for items in cash can truly keep you out of debt.

I came from the old school:  If you have a check, you’ve got money.  If you have money, spend it.  If you don’t have to pay until 2012 for furniture, don’t.  Wrong Answer!  I never thought I’d pay cash for a vehicle, but that’s the only way we pay for them now.  We buy a 1 or 2 year old car for 1/2 the price with 10K miles on it and enjoy it till it pants it’s last breath.  If you save for something, there is a great sense of accomplishment, that you’ve truly earned it and No One can take it from you.

Flavored Coffee (My favorite):  It’s a hug in a mug and we all need a reward!

Pumpkin Spice Latte

Toffee Mocha Latte

(here’s a tip: soy milk with no whip, takes 100 calories off a grande size drink)

Free Phone App – RunKeeper

Keeps track of distance:  how far I walk or run:  shows calories burned, average miles per minute, current pace, shows GPS Map of your walking pattern, and will post to Facebook, if you choose.

Mac Laptop

Apple provides an amazing assortment of programs and applications to allow your creative spirit to soar; designing your own home movies, writing a blog or book, burning dvd’s, downloading your favorite itunes, cropping and editing pictures for a fun slideshow and the list goes on .

Old Navy – Vanilla Mint Lip Balm (sold at the counter)

When I’m out and about, without makeup, there is something refreshing about putting on a fun, minty lip balm to soften those lips and give you an extra kick in your step.  You almost get an attitude.  : )

Shoes:

http://www.lulus.com

http://www.lulus.com/categories/179/shoes.html&wtid=8449c9b3e4abf08ec7c943d046d1e77e

An amazing assortment of sassy ladies’ shoes that you don’t always find at the local shoe store.  It may even spark an “out of the ordinary – let’s try a new look.”  Hey, can’t hurt to shake things up a little.

I hope some of these ideas help you kick start a New You. Here’s to Shakin’ it Up! Would love to hear your ideas.

It was a gorgeous day out, so I had all the kids playing with those huge bubble wands on the back porch.  As I walked thru the kitchen, admiring all the fun they were having, I didn’t notice they had spilled a pint of bubbles on the floor. I slid across the hard woods, like a cartoon character, trying to grab everything I skidded past to save myself, and landed in the splits by the back door.  I chipped my elbow, sprained my wrist and bruised my knee.

In the blink of an eye, I went from walking across the kitchen floor in running shoes, (thinking fondly of my kids), to landing in the splits by the back door – and didn’t even see it coming. I was totally blind sided by the entire event.  One minute I was here, and the next, I was gone!

There’s a song by Revive, called  ”It Happens in a Blink” and it sure did.

It happens in a Blink

It happens in a Flash,

It happens in the Time it took to look Back

You try to hold on Tight,

But there’s no stopping Time,

What have I done with my Life!

There are 86,400 seconds in a day and we’re not promised them all.

Teach me to number my days, that I may have a heart of wisdom and fulfill my Purpose for this Life.  Ps. 90:12

The clock is ticking, and like characters in a story, none of us know how much time we have left.  Some people pass at the ripe old age of 100, others – due to foreseen illness . . . while many are on our way from here to there, in a hurry, thinking about our next business meeting, what they’re making for dinner, and In the blink of an eye, we’re here today and gone tomorrow.  We’re standing upright, and the next moment we’re doing the splits by the heavenly door.

Make it count, before you turn around and it’s too late.  The Hands of Time are ticking and there are no real do-overs.  There are few things that can’t be recovered in life, and one is Time – after it’s been Spent.

If today was your last day, who would you call, what would you say, how would you do it differently?  It’s easy to say: Live like you’re dying.   But do we . . . Really?

Do our kids know how we feel about them or is work more important?

When I was a kid, no matter what we did for fun or how many times, I always begged for ONE More!  Sometimes you get it, sometimes you won’t.

We get the call in the night, that changes our life forever.  Write the letter, write the book, write the blog, make the call, put down your most pressing issues that really aren’t so pressing.  It Happens in a Blink!

When I was 5 years old, I fell off the top of a bunk bed, dreaming that I could roll forever.  It was a vivid dream of white puffy clouds, until I got a 1/2 roll and Boom, off I went.  My head karate chopped the side of the bed  . . . and I won a round trip ticket to the ER.

From that day on, I became quiet familiar with the Emergency Room, acquiring stitches many more times, before moving out of the “clumsy, oops I did it again” stage of my life.

From reaching up to place a bird in its nest and falling 10 feet, to slashing my ankle in a stain glass shop, it seemed as though I had a scarlet thread of “oppsie daisies” running through my life.

Some accidents involved selfless acts, others involved adventure; and while the memories of those days are vague, the scars still remain.  Sometimes we need those scars to remind us of tough days gone by.  Some people suffer from disease, loss of a job, a child, a home or loss of themselves.

You look at a scar and know there’s a story.  It’s easy to complain.  Complaints seem to jump out at every opportunity and like a ball rolling down a hill, it has its own momentum, taking little effort to sustain:  the kids are driving you crazy, the dishes and laundry are mounting a war, your budget isn’t big enough, the car isn’t clean enough.  We wished we had a grocery delivery service, an errand boy, a nanny, a better job, a bigger house, more time, more money, a date night, someone who thinks I’m right – and the list goes on.

We all suffer hardships and unpleasantries, some more than others for sure . . . I read a blog the other day of a woman who had just had a baby.  She wrote a Top 10 List of all the things she loves about having a newborn.  And also admitted, she could write a list equally as long, listing all the tough – how did this happen, what have I done, this hurts, why won’t they sleep, wha wha wha moments, but she chose not to.

Turn your face toward the goodness, the hopefulness.  Lift up your eyes and count the blessings.  Write them down, shout ‘em from the roof top; however you’re reminded, do it.  Look at the weight you’ve lost, not the weight that remains; be thankful for the car you drive, not wishing for something you don’t; embrace the moments you have with your family; live life to the fullest.  The living room is messy, but you have a house full of happy kids.  In the Race of Life, we can choose to focus on the moans and groans, and heavy breathing to the finish line, or we can be thankful that WE’RE BREATHING!

Life on this earth will bring heartache, you can count on it.  I’ve never met anyone who’s truly lived, that didn’t bare a scar.  What is your view from the front porch looking’ in?  Will you look at the scar and view hardship or what you gained through the experience.  You’re alive . . . every day, hour and minute, you can have a do-over to make this life, Something Beautiful.

A Word to the Wise: If you find yourself on a bunk bed, dreaming you can roll forever . . . Don’t Do It!

Do everything without complaining or arguing” (Philippians 2:14)

Growing up, my Dad always said:  There’s a Hard Way and an Easy Way.  For whatever reason, I chose the hard one- and ended up with a few more beats, bumps and bruises along the way.

Probably like you, our kids wake up for school in the dark.  I’m not a morning person.  I would much rather see the sun Set than the sun Rise; and I’m a firm believer it’s not truly daytime, when the moon is still up at 6am.

I’m always asking moms how they handle morning routines, after school snacks and endless laundry.  There’s no reason to re-invent the wheel.  I’d rather copy it.

Does this sound familiar?  I would get up 30 minutes before the kids woke up, commence to make lunches and realize we’re out of bread.  Hmmm . . . there’s no cereal for breakfast and only 3 mis-matched socks in the laundry basket.  I was spinning my wheels, trying to re-configure Plan A with Plan C about the time the kids were waking up.

“Mom!  said child #1:  Where’s the socks . . . One is crying, I don’t want to take a frozen burrito to school – there’s no microwave.”  Child #3 is still sleeping, after I’ve run up the stairs twice to wake him and Child #2 is upset because he wanted cereal, instead of last night’s pork chop for breakfast.    Poor kids, what a mess.  If only I were organized!

I have 3 boys in school:  Pre-k, 1st & 3rd.  I know what it’s like to bribe, fight, cry and whine my way through morning rush hour to get them to brush their teeth, eat breakfast and get dressed in the morning.  Then one day, after dreading the morning routine, I decided enough was enough.  I’m the boss of this joint and I’m not gonna take it anymore. If there was going to be a Revolt, it was coming from me!

And just like that, the Pletka family went through boot camp 101.  Like a captain in the Army, I put them in a single file line and we marched from upstairs to downstairs, acting out the way I wanted “Morning Routine” to look like. The baby followed along with her blankie dragging behind.  No more whining . . . no more crying . . . no more “I don’t wanna wear that.”  Nope, nada, nein, not gonna happen.

I lined them up one by one and asked:  Are you potty trained?  Yes Mom!  Do you know where the spoons are located?  Yes Mom.  Do you know how to pour Milk? And the list went on.  Just like the movie Dodgeball, in a scruffy, old, cynical voice he said:  If you can Dodge a Wrench, you can Dodge a Ball . . . My theory was:  If you can pour milk, you can feed yourself!

And this is how it went down: I began placing cereal in a bowl with a spoon in it, the night before.  All they have to do is pour the milk and eat.

In the evenings, when we make lunches for the kids, I lay out their clothes, socks, shoes, back packs, lunch boxes, the whole enchilada, to make this portion of the day, run like a well-oiled machine.  If a pair of socks or one shoe is missing, it can be a deal breaker – put a glitch in the morning, maybe miss the bus and everyone’s in a bad mood.  If Jr.’s shoes are outside under the trampoline, you’re up the creek.

We placed alarm clocks in each room, so they go off at the same time, or pretty darn close.  They come running down the stairs, trying to pass each other along the way.  It sounds like a herd of animals running on their heels, beating and thumping all the way down.  This, in turn, becomes my alarm clock.

While one is eating breakfast, the other brushes his teeth and yet another is putting on his clothes.  They circulate through the 3 step process with minutes to spare.  Life is much better, now that we have a system in place.  They feel a little more independent, I’m relinquished of my role as drill sergeant and am realizing these little guys are growing up fast and I need to freeze frame all the moments.

Life has changed.  We sleep a 1/2 an hour longer, lunches are pre-made at night, outfits are pre-approved and the kids are much happier.

I’m amazed at how children can step up and make it happen, when we raise the bar and increase our expectations of them. There’s a Hard Way and an Easy Way, both with the same destination, but how you get there, can make ya or break ya.  Enjoy Your Life!

Proverbs 22:6  Train up a child in the way he should go, so when he’s old, he will not depart from it.

The other night, about 3am I woke up to a loud thunderstorm.  The entire room lit up and our dog Max, (a terrier slash fox hound – whose talents include jumping, digging and howling like the hound that he is) was shaking uncontrollably underneath the bed.  He was deathly afraid of the storm, and with every tremble . . . he farted.

We’ve had this dog 10 years, and I’ve never known this to happen.  Of course, it’s never on John’s side of the bed, always mine, but it wouldn’t matter.  If a tornado took the roof off the bedroom, John would continue to sleep.

I have to say, Max has been through a lot in his 10 years with this family.  In the beginning, (BK) Before Kids, he was the Prince of the House.  He wore sweaters, napped at the end of our bed, had a constant stream of bones and toys at his disposal.   Life was one big adventure.

As time went on and kids began to infiltrate our home, one by one, he moved lower down the totem pole.  At this stage, he’s just excited that someone remembers to feed him.  Good ole Loyal Max.  When we brought him home from the animal shelter, we proudly bestowed him with the name Jack.  A good solid name for a terrier, don’t ya think?

One year into enjoying our little Jack, we found out we were having a boy, and the name Jack suddenly became a valuable commodity.  My husband’s name is John and he wanted his son to be named after him, but we did not want to burden the kid with being John the 4th.   So we changed the dog’s name from Jack to Max and gave it to our son.   Poor thing was confused for . . . who am I kidding — he’s still confused.   He’ll come to anything you call him.

So when I woke up, it wasn’t the lightening that acquired my attention, it was the smell of FEAR, that smelled like a fart.  That’s the way it is in life.  We fear the storm, we fear failure, we fear loss of a job, we fear lack of safety for our children.  Fear is like an electric fence you can’t see, with signs hanging everywhere -  “Beware”, “Feel Guilty” “Don’t Forgive” “Don’t Try This”, “Failure Isn’t An Option” You’re a Loser” “Don’t Rock the Boat”  “You Won’t be Accepted” . . . It holds us prisoner within invisible borders, whispering to us in the night.

Don’t allow FEAR to get its tentacles in you.  Instead, embrace life, get up and grab it by the horns; write your own signs:  Seize the Day, Try New Things, Do Your Best & Forget All the Rest, Failure IS an Option.  We learn when we Fail.  Of course, we don’t want to fall, but if living in Fear of Failure is gonna hold you back from pursuing a life of meaning, adventure, peace and purpose, then it has to go.

You don’t want to wake up in the night and smell fear. It presents itself in various forms, shapes and sizes, often renaming itself, in hopes of disguising its identity.  You can put new clothes on it, maybe add some lipstick, but it’s not your friend.  Just like Max trembling under the bed in unproductive Fear, (not the adrenaline rush you need, before standing in front of a crowd) but the kind of fear that holds you captive, holds you hostage to the great life you deserve – Fear, by any other name, is just a bad smell.

Now go out and live the life of Purpose and Meaning that God has called you to live – and embrace the adventure.

Fear not, I have redeemed you.  I have called you by name, you are mine.  When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.  And through the rivers, they shall now overwhelm you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned.  And the flame shall not consume you.  Isaiah 43: 1-2

Do you ever teach your kids things like sharing, honesty, responsibility you know, all the character stuff, and hope to goodness it sticks?

The other day we (me, my 4 kids and husband) spent the day at the pool; as soon as we walked in the door, the kids are hollering:  What’s for dinner?  I mean, we just got home.  If I could click my heels, dinner would be on the table, but give a mom a break, would ya?

Where’s my shoes?  Can you untie this?  I need socks!  Where’s my piano book? Where’s the PIANO?  I mean, really?  I think kids get so use to relying on mom to do everything, they begin to ask questions they already know the answer to.  I said:  Do you know where clean underwear comes from?  And, as if I was about to reveal where Santa Claus lives, the excitable 4 year old said:  Where?

I felt like a rebellious teenager.  I rose up and said:    The Laundry Room!  Eight little eyes looked at me as if I had said:  no more cartoons for the rest of your life!

Where are my shoes?  Wherever you put them.  Do I have underwear?  I hope so.  I felt rattled.  I said:   I quit. . . I quit . . . I quit.  They stood in Silence – Then came the giggles.  “Mom you can’t quit.”  You’re MOM.

Of course, I couldn’t  quit.  Nor did I really want too.  I mean, if someone else tried to walk in and take my place, I’d give them a run for their money.  We may complain, but we still want the job, right?

But what I have learned, is kids can be responsible for things, even at the smallest of ages, and while they may buck the system in the beginning, they sorta like the whole “team spirit” I’m apart of something “greater than myself” mentality.

It gives them a chance to see how life really works; they aren’t the center of everything, rather they’re one of MANY spokes on the family wheel.  It’s good for them to see how dinner gets made, and how clean shirts make it from the laundry basket to their closet.

They begin to take pride in helping with the dishes, the laundry, cleaning out the car and sweeping the kitchen.  Look at your to-do-list, tear off a piece and give it to them.  Before long, they’ll expect a chore or two, and before you know it, they’ll be cleaning the house, making dinner and doing the laundry. . .  I’m envisioning it now.  It’s all a process.  Just stay consistent and the rewards will be great.  Until then, has anyone seen the piano?

Teach me to number my days, that I might gain a heart of wisdom and fulfill your purpose for my life.  Psalm 90:12